Posted: 8/10/2016

Two blondes were on their way to Disneyland and came to a fork in the road. The sign read: "Disneyland Left." So they went home.


Posted: 7/12/2016

Q: Why did the blonde keep a picture of herself in her room? A: So she could use it as a mirror.

Dyed hair

Posted: 6/24/2016

Q: What do you call a blonde who has dyed her hair brown? A: Artificial intelligence.

Going home early

Posted: 6/15/2016

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead all work for a female boss who always goes home early. "Hey girls," says the brunette. "Let's go home early tomorrow. She'll never know." So the next day, they all leave right after their boss. The brunette gets some extra gardening done, the redhead goes to a bar, and the blonde goes home to find her husband having sex with the female boss. She quietly sneaks out of the house and returns at her normal time. "That was fun," says the brunette. "We should do it again sometime." "No way," says the blonde. "I almost got caught."

What did the egg say to the boiling water?

Posted: 5/25/2016

It's gonna take me a minute to get hard, I just got laid by a chicken

Blondes Brain

Posted: 5/18/2016

Q: What do you call a blonde with two brain cells? A: Pregnant.

A husband and a wife having dinner.

Posted: 5/10/2016

A husband and a wife sit at the table, having dinner. The woman drops a bit of tomato sauce on her white top. "Och, I look like a pig!" The man nods, "And you dropped tomato sauce on your top!"


Posted: 5/10/2016

A beautiful woman loves to garden, but can't seem to get her tomatoes to turn red. She asks her neighbor, "What do you do to get your tomatoes red?" He replies, "Twice a day I stand in front of my tomato garden and expose myself. My tomatoes turn red from blushing so much." The woman decides to do the same thing. So twice a day for two weeks she exposes herself to the garden. Her neighbor asks, "How did it go? Did you tomatoes turn red?" "No," she replies, "but my cucumbers are enormous."

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